Valentine's Day?

Sorry Bitches. M is a dumb shit and accidently moved this and doesn't know how to move it back. Ha. You know you love me

Yup it's right around the corner. The most dreaded holiday of the year, Valentine's Day. Fuck! Shit! UGh! Might be the first thing that pop's into your head when you hear people mention V-Day. Well it's going to happen so you might as well make the best of it. So what's the right way to go about celebrating this day?
Well S and M of course will be each other's valentines.  DUH! A) we are both fucking hot. B) BFFS HELLLOOO. C) We are totally in love with each other. So we realize most of you can't keep up and might fall short of our amazing day together. Well don't worry we will sympathize with you, and give you some fucking awesome ways to celebrate this day!
        Let's Start at Square One: If you don't have a mate.
       You might think you have it the worse of any other situation. But being alone on valentine's day can actually be a lot of fun! ( not that S and M would know, because guys are always coming after us). Anyways, first off it's a great excuse to go buy a vibrator and have some fun with your self. Okay I know what you thinking. Scary!!! But seriously you need to enjoy all of yourself on this day, and I mean ALL of your self. Do it, you won't regret it. No one deserves not to get some on this day, even if it's from yourself! Now that you have got your pleasure covered, think of three things that you LOVE to do. Hello,this day is about love! Make a spa appointment, go on a hike, pick out your favorite movie, get/make your favorite food. This day is about you, you independent Biotch! Don't you dare sit on your couch and mope eating ice cream and watching He's Just Not That Into You, The Notebook, or whatever lame as fuck movie you can think of to make yourself feel like shit.; thinking your pathetic for being alone. Your Great, you are freakin HOT, and Don't need a man! Make this a day about yourself. Be a Selfish Slut!
   Now let's just say you've been hooking up with a guy for a while, and there is a possibility for him to ask you to be his so-called "Valentine".
      Okay a couple  of things you should know, is that guys don't like to be alone just as much as girls. However, he might be a huge douche bag, and be hooking up with another girl at the same time as you( or something along those lines). In this cause He really is a flaming douche bag, and obviously not worth your time, and you should probably refer to the previous paragraph. If this isn't the case, still don't expect anything. This day already carries so many expectations, and it will only make it worse if you think he's going to send you flowers or take you out on a date or other cliche valentine's day activities such as these. Take everything with a grain of salt this day, and don't be a bitch towards him if he doesn't do anything for you. Relationships aren't about doing things for each other, and that's a terrible way to start out. Instead, act like it doesn't bother you (because it shouldn't!). And if he doesn't ask you have a back up boy. Duh! And I know you have one, we all have one. And if he does ask you out on a date or whatevers.. "Good for you, You Stupid BITCH"!
Finally, the more serious of the three. This is the case that probably has it the worse. Like I said previously, there are so many expectations on this day. Being in a relationship makes these expectations even worse. But chill! Your guy isn't dumb, even though sometimes you might think so. He's going to try to please you in the best ways he can and knows how on this day. Just be grateful you get to spend the day with him and get to have a valentine. Some girls would kill for one on this day.
So Get some on this day you Whores!


XOXO
Stay GolDAMN
S & M