The Benefits of Having a Sex Friend

I wonder if they're gonna order a pizza

You’ve had a  great day at work, a wild weekend, a lazy Sunday and what exactly do you need to put the cherry on top? A little P in V action. Now, if you are newly single, currently single, or just not the relationship type what are you gonna do?

This is where the sex friend comes in.  We all know that person. You find them attractive, you have a little bit of chemistry but you could never, ever see yourself having a serious relationship with them. These types of people make the perfect sex friend.

Sex friends can offer lots of support. By knowing there is someone out there DTF no matter what outfit you wore out, how high your heels were, how gelled and spikey you got your hair to be, it takes a lot of pressure off of the situation.  By taking the pressure off the situation you are able to let your inhibitions go. You are able to try new things, be wilder, scream louder, and get crazy. When you are able to try these new things and perfect your “skills” so that when you do find someone that you want to be in a committed relationship with that you know exactly what your good at, exactly what new things to show your partner, and exactly what you need to be pleased.

Here’s the thing though. Don’t take your sex friend for granted. Don’t be calling them up if you haven’t showered in 3 days. Don’t try and overstay your welcome. Don’t be texting them 24 hours a day. All this is extremely annoying. And no one likes annoying.

Having a sex friend can come with consequences. With casual sex there is always the chance of developing feelings. Unless this is a mutual occurrence there is possibilities for heartbreak. This is something you always need to think about with your sex friend.  We’ve all seen the movies, the FWB things “never works” but if you do it right it can. Just cut it off before it gets too far.

If you’re considering having a sex friend, choose carefully and guard yourself. And always use protection J

Forever GOLDamn,

S&M

(and yes, the virgin statuses still remain)

Spit or Swallow?..that is the question

Your down on your guy, you feel his one-eyed pirate about to scream arr; do you host the sails and take his precious treasure down the hatch or do you throw his semen over board? Well listen up bitches stop acting like little stuck-up sluts and swallow his good stuff! 
S and M would never encourage any type of behavior, we are just here to give you the best advice virgins can give about sex. And to be real, there is nothing sexier to a man when a woman can swallow their busted nut. Sure, no one really enjoys the taste of that white, sticky liquid, but when in rome... swallow. It shows your man your not afraid of what he has to offer, and that you like it. Think of it this way, if you were dining with royalty, you wouldn't spit out anything you did not like, would you? Of course not! It is rude! Well the same goes for the bedroom; it is bad bedroom-etiquette to spit your man's juices out. Show him that you want to please him in every possible way, and that you have the control when your down on his junk. It will make his orgasm that much better, and he will have  good thoughts about wanting to hook up with you again! There is nothing a guy likes better than good head, and swallowing is that cherry on top! 
Speaking of food, men, if you know your going to get some, help a girl out. Drink plenty of water, and if you are feeling really nice, down some pineapples! This sweet treat can turn your spoiled milk in to some sweet vanilla cream! Some other good foods to eat for a great taste are: Other Fruits, Vegetables ( but avoid those high in sulfur AKA salt), Celery, and even Cinnamon! Some foods to keep in mind that might make your load taste bad: Coffee, Garlic, Onions, Broccoli, Cigarets, and Dairy products. 
So ladies get on those knees and slurp up that good stuff! 
Remember Spitting is just rude! 


Stay golDAMN 
love, 
S&M

Dirty, dirty mind...

What do you think is on her mind??

Studies, Magazines, stories, and the Internet all tell us that boys think about sex about every 7 seconds, or at least several times a day. Well world, I may have that beat.

So to test this today I am going to count every time I think about sex, having sex, wanting sex, fantasizing, and talking about sex. Wish me luck.

Hours later….

Well. The day is over and the tally’s are in. After about 30 I lost track. Yes, that’s right. 30! I bet you had no idea right?  Seriously guys, girls think about sex a lot . We want sex a lot. The thing is sometimes it can appear slutty for a girl to initiate sex, especially when you haven’t made it clear that that is okay. While hot bitches like S&M don’t usually struggle with this problem, it happens to the best of women.

The point of this is don’t be afraid to at least try and get us in the sack. I mean come on, we know it’s all that you are thinking about. And now you know, its just about always on our minds as well. Get out there and initiate! Trust me, that is all it is going to take.   So tonight instead of just crawling into bed after that long movie, put the moves on. 9/10 times you’ll probably both get what you want,  SEX.

Forever GolDAMN

LOVE,

S&M

Make Me Go from ehhh-not-tonight to I-NEED-YOU-NOW

You know those days where your just like... exhausted? Or lazy? Or just plain old bored? YA I SAID IT. BORED! I have a lot of those days. Where all I want to do is hop in the shower, pull on my sweats (luckily I have the ability to look like a sex goddess in sweats, so don't let them fool you) and hop into bed with movie. But I know that look you are giving me. The whole "Are you kidding me we aren't going to do it?" look.  Well let me let you in on a little secret. You CAN change that. And I'm gonna tell you how to make her go from 0 to 60 in .2 seconds.

Any girl has these magic "Wow Me" spots. All you have to do is get it right and she'll be puddy in your hands. Let's go over a few of my favorite and you can try them out and see what works best for you


HOT SPOTS
The Neck: Any form of wet, sensual slow kisses on the side or back of a girls neck will drive her wild. I'm not saying suck away and try and give your bitch a hickey (that move at this time will drive her straight to bed and probably have you sleeping on the floor. Trust me, I've made many-a-man sleep on the floor). What I'm talking about are the slow, long drawn out, kisses that make a girl's knees weak. Pulling a girls hair to the side, kissing her neck and making her know that you are there, and ready, and that basically she drive you wild will have her in your arms (and in the bed) within minutes. There may need to be some making out before (and who's complaining) but you will get what you want, and what she wanted deep deep down...


The Ears: The ears are a hearth of feel goodies. The right little lick and nibble could have a girl straddling you in the time it takes her to turn off your ESPN. And that is fast. Feeling a man's breath against you face, having the warmth all of a sudden overtake you is a wild way to get your girl from wanting to put in her retainer and turn on Lifetime to having her doing a strip tease for you and leaving heels on during the dirty. A good ear seduciton shouldn't be wet. Don't use your tongue like a Q-Tip (I had a man-ho/boyfriend do that once, I literally wanted to punch him in the gonads) but instead focus on the ear lob, ya know where she has the earrings. It works a lot better if she doesn't have earrings in because no one wants a mouth full of metal (one of the reasons the Ortho always says no to BJ's with braces. Wait your's didn't tell you that? Shit well this is awkward...) so save it for a night where her jewelry is off. When it is surprise her from behind (haha...) and take a little nibble and lick at that lob. This move will seriously have her "Dripping for you." 


The Infamous Back Massage: This is so many guys' go-to move. Your woman is telling you how tired she is, how hard work was, how her back hurts, how she's stressed and you know exactly what to do. Offer the girl a massage! The back massage (especially with a little oil or lotion) is not only a great way to get your hoe naked, but also lets you make her relax, plus you'll be straddling her, and who could complain about that. A relaxed girl can easily be turned into a horny girl with just the right knead. Instead of focusing solely on the shoulders, explore the whole back. Run your hands all the way down her spine and up her neck. Go for a little side action as well (hey you may even be able to cop a feel with a little side boob). Getting your girl here and showing her how good your are with your hands will have her wanting you to show her where else you can be "handy."


Try these moves out on your girl. If you still can't get her to play a little "tickle-me-elmo" than she's probably a boring bitch anyways and not even worth the lay. Or you just suck. Either way you are screwed.


Forever GolDAMN,
S&M

No Butt to Putt

Anal Sex. As a male you may think that this is something that you want to try. But you dont. I'm sorry but nothing turns off a hot bitch more than downright anal sex. Yes, yes we know that there those people out there that definitely enjoy having your rod stuck up their pooter, but we are not those girls. And none of our friends are those girls. And none of their friends are those girls. And if your girl isn't in that group than she probably isn't worth f***ing anyways.

But lets get to the point here. No matter if you use a condom, if she's all "clean" in there... Anal sex is gross to us. Like. I almost just vomited on my computer screen gross. I don't want that up there, She doesn't want that up there, you shouldn't want to put your prized possession up there. So please just stop trying. And stop asking. The answer is NO.

Plus we know your tricky little ways. The whole "Come on baby, it will be so special. My first time and your first time." I know that line, and I know that if you're trying to use that line on me that that is not your first time that you have tried to clean the chocolate chimney with your fleshy equipment. And the answer is still no. Oooohhh or how about this line "OH BABY I was so in the moment/ drunk/ horny/ awesome that I thought it was the right hole... I'm sorry I'll get it right..."  You are a loser. You really think I wouldn't notice you trying to put your one eyed wonder muscle in my butthole? REALLY. The answer is still no.

So if you ever plan on hooking up with S&M, which we know you all do, keep your P in our V and don't let it go anywhere near my B. GOT IT?

Forever GolDAMN

LOVE,
S&M

A little added note: If you are a gay man by all means go for the anal. We totally love the gays and everything you all do. Its fun to hear you be happy. You deserve a little lovin in your one little oven. But seriously, don't try that shit on me.

Dry Spell

M and S have gone through a dry spell yes it is true. It has been a while since we've blogged, but don't be fooled we're back bitches and were ready to get our hands dirty, amongst other things. 

Doggie Wanna Bone?

Even though S and M are more into the scissoring style of sex, we all know that there are so many positions out there: The Flower press, the Vertigo, the Missionary, the Reverse Cowgirl. The list goes on an on. However, what position puts the "OOOOOOO" in OOOOOORGASM?
S and M have the answer:
DOGGIE STYLE. 
Let's face sex is better when its Ruff! And what better way for each of you to give it to each other than in doggie; we got facts.
If your a pussy and don't think you can handle some fourth grade talk about dicks and vajayjays then stop reading... but really you are a freakin' pussy.
A guys dick is shaped like a mushroom. ( Unless your Chris Brown, then your in an entirely different category). On the underside of his anaconda, or garden snake to those who largely-challenged, where the body meets the head is a little raised line. This is a mans achilles heel. When this line is rubbed, licked, touched, bit ( if you know how to do it right) then he will be moaning louder than a wild hyena. So, in order for a guy to have ultimate pleasure while having sex this line has got to be crossed. Essentially, this is a man's G-spot.
Speaking of that Let's talk about the girls. We all know about the G-Spot, its the goodie good. It is a known fact that most women don't orgasm during sexy time. That's Bullshit, and we are calling it out. HHHHelllloooooooooo, your man obviously doesn't know how to do it right. It sucks to suck, but trust me you can teach and old dog new tricks. Luckily for them and you S and M can help you out. THE G-SPOT NEEDS TO BE HIT! Period. You need to give it to your lady. Hit that clit a little bit before she gets on all fours and make her bark. And make sure when you are giving her that chaaaWAWA, that your hittin that G. And if that still doesn't do it for your biotch, then do some rub while you chub. ( rub the clit while your having sex for those of you who can't get an efing clue).
Okay, so between the snake's vein and the cave's stalactite there is one position that hits both of these dead on: Doggie. It is the Perfect position.
Ladies Bend over or get on all fours, and men nike that shit.
And remember bitches like it ruff. BOW WOW!
Stay GoldDAMN
xoxo
S & M
P.S. S & M are not saying only do doggie, Mix it up, get crazy, and have fun.
P.S.P.S. YES WE ARE VIRGINS.

Fantasizing about me?

We all have them. And they're hot. You know what I'm talking. Same Sex Fantasies.

Just because you fantasize about someone of the same sex doesn't mean your gay or lesbian (I mean it could.... but thats not a fo sho case) Having a naughty dream about some hot celebrity (or even about your BFF like S&M do) is a perfectly normal thing. And we think you should do it all the time!

I enjoy a good lesbian fantasy every now and then. I even enjoy a good lesbian night every now and then. But that doesn't mean I'm a lesbian for all time! I just love making out and the human body, whether that be  a man's or a woman's. And you should feel the same. Be open with having those hot erotic dreams and fantasies, no matter who they're about!

There is nothing wrong with experimentation. Whether it be in your dreams or in real life. Just be secure in who you are and know for sure whether you like the stick or the hole (penis or vagina if your slow....)

Guys have a problem with this because they're so afraid that if they think about another man and his unmentionables (geez im just gonna come out and say it. PENIS) that they're automatically gay. But hey you have one too so why not play with someone elses in your dreams. As long as its not all you think about we really don't see anything wrong with it. Go ahead and have your little day dreams. Just think about me 99% of the time and him 1%. (And you better not call me Steve in bed)

My mom put it best one time saying,"M, you are not a slut. Your just a drunk Lesbian. And nothing is wrong with that."

The bottom line is to not freak out if you have a little lesbian fantasy or even a little gay one. As long as you know what you want in the long run there is nothing wrong with letting your mind wander.

Forever GolDAMN
S&M

Half the fun is talking about it

S&M are very open about everything. Especially when it comes to sex. But we're virgins, so don't get the wrong idea.


Whether your with someone or out and about on your own, talking about sex and everything that goes along with it should be something you enjoy. Talk about it with your girlfriends, with your guy friends, with your roommates. It doesn't matter who! Just be open about it. Crack open a bottle of wine (or a fifth for all I care) and share some stories with your friends. It'll be fun I promise. There is no reason to be shy about it! Everyone loves to do it, so what's wrong with talking about something we all love?

Yes yes some people consider sex to be a very private thing, and thats perfectly fine, but you should always have at least one person in your life you can be completely open with. Not only does it make your relationship with that person more intimate, but it's also fun! Talking about sex and the experiences you've had is a natural thing. We all do it (well we don't.... but you do you big sluts) so we should be open about it.
Sharing your thoughts, feelings and experiences is fun. S&M love sharing stories, whether they be funny, kinky, sexy or embarrassing it's a way to express yourself. Don't worry you don't have to tell the raunchy details cause we don't want to hear about that (S does, seriously, she does).

If you're feeling real adventurous you can go out and visit a sex store with your friends. This recently occurred with some of S&M's friends A&J (hot bitches FYI) and it was quite and experience. Not only can you see extremely scary things (did you know they have penises there the size of a bodybuilders thigh?) but you can laugh about the crazy things that some people do together. Maybe even pick up a few items along the way? Surprising your other half can be super fun!

SO BITCHES. Get out there and start talking about it. Maybe you'll learn some new things or some new tricks. (Let's hope, cause you're all boring the shit out of me)

LOVE
S&M

Valentine's Day?

Sorry Bitches. M is a dumb shit and accidently moved this and doesn't know how to move it back. Ha. You know you love me

Yup it's right around the corner. The most dreaded holiday of the year, Valentine's Day. Fuck! Shit! UGh! Might be the first thing that pop's into your head when you hear people mention V-Day. Well it's going to happen so you might as well make the best of it. So what's the right way to go about celebrating this day?
Well S and M of course will be each other's valentines.  DUH! A) we are both fucking hot. B) BFFS HELLLOOO. C) We are totally in love with each other. So we realize most of you can't keep up and might fall short of our amazing day together. Well don't worry we will sympathize with you, and give you some fucking awesome ways to celebrate this day!
        Let's Start at Square One: If you don't have a mate.
       You might think you have it the worse of any other situation. But being alone on valentine's day can actually be a lot of fun! ( not that S and M would know, because guys are always coming after us). Anyways, first off it's a great excuse to go buy a vibrator and have some fun with your self. Okay I know what you thinking. Scary!!! But seriously you need to enjoy all of yourself on this day, and I mean ALL of your self. Do it, you won't regret it. No one deserves not to get some on this day, even if it's from yourself! Now that you have got your pleasure covered, think of three things that you LOVE to do. Hello,this day is about love! Make a spa appointment, go on a hike, pick out your favorite movie, get/make your favorite food. This day is about you, you independent Biotch! Don't you dare sit on your couch and mope eating ice cream and watching He's Just Not That Into You, The Notebook, or whatever lame as fuck movie you can think of to make yourself feel like shit.; thinking your pathetic for being alone. Your Great, you are freakin HOT, and Don't need a man! Make this a day about yourself. Be a Selfish Slut!
   Now let's just say you've been hooking up with a guy for a while, and there is a possibility for him to ask you to be his so-called "Valentine".
      Okay a couple  of things you should know, is that guys don't like to be alone just as much as girls. However, he might be a huge douche bag, and be hooking up with another girl at the same time as you( or something along those lines). In this cause He really is a flaming douche bag, and obviously not worth your time, and you should probably refer to the previous paragraph. If this isn't the case, still don't expect anything. This day already carries so many expectations, and it will only make it worse if you think he's going to send you flowers or take you out on a date or other cliche valentine's day activities such as these. Take everything with a grain of salt this day, and don't be a bitch towards him if he doesn't do anything for you. Relationships aren't about doing things for each other, and that's a terrible way to start out. Instead, act like it doesn't bother you (because it shouldn't!). And if he doesn't ask you have a back up boy. Duh! And I know you have one, we all have one. And if he does ask you out on a date or whatevers.. "Good for you, You Stupid BITCH"!
Finally, the more serious of the three. This is the case that probably has it the worse. Like I said previously, there are so many expectations on this day. Being in a relationship makes these expectations even worse. But chill! Your guy isn't dumb, even though sometimes you might think so. He's going to try to please you in the best ways he can and knows how on this day. Just be grateful you get to spend the day with him and get to have a valentine. Some girls would kill for one on this day.
So Get some on this day you Whores!


XOXO
Stay GolDAMN
S & M

So You Wanna Be an Actor Huh?

Dressing up shouldn't just be for halloween. The bedroom is a great place for being a sexy cop, a playful bunny, or a hot nurse. Guys think more than you think. Meaning you have to keep them entertained you fucking biotches. Since, S and M are the fantasies of every guys imagination, we are going to help level the playing field to you other hot sluts.
First off, you have to know what your guy is interested in. For example, if he is into sports dress up as a cheerleader, and help make him score. Or if he's not into school, dress up as a school teacher and teach him a lesson in detention. Or if your guy loves the stars dress up as Princess Leia, and play with his lightsaber. There are so many roles you can play when fulfilling your man's dirty mind.
Second, you have to be playful in role playing. Confidence and Sexy flirtation is a must( for pointers about these qualities see our "Art of a Strip Tease" blog). Get super into the role. This will spice up the sexual tension, and leave room for an ultimate gasm. Trust me ladies if you walked into your guys bedroom dressed up as a french maid he's bound to oil spill in his pants.
Thirdly, if your still kind of confused you should probably go watch some porn. And I don't mean soft porn. Watch some dirty, kinky fucking porn. Hellooooo, your man obviously watches porn, and if you don't think so your fucking dumb. So he's seen the Heather Brooke moves and Jenna Jameson scenes, meaning you can get as freaky as you like. If he watches it, he's gotta like it. So get freaky bitches!!
Role playing can spice up your sex life, which, let's face it, is the backbone to any relationship. Bad sex=BYE BYE whereas amazing sex=more amazing sex! Ladies you have the power to make your relationship fucking hot!

WALK OF SHAME or WALK OF FAME

Wanna know the only test that will truly tell you if you're a slut or not? Here it is
     In your entire life how many walks of shame have you had to do? More than 1? SLUT

But Seriously, the walk of shame is inevitable. 99% of college girls have done it and that 1% that hasn't is only because they only hook up with Freshman boys so obviously they stay at their crib with the little boys rather than drunkenly making their way out to the dorms.

The only reason the walk of shame sucks is because you have to trek back to your place carrying your heels either sporting an oversized sweatshirt over your ho dress or some giant ass basketball shorts and your cleavage bearing top. The outfit is a big ole no no in real life, but that dreaded morning after its about the best you can do. While yes, your feet do hurt, your makeup is smeared down your face, and you have morning after hair, don't focus on that. Focus on the GolDAMN!

S&M think you should stop being such pussys about the walk of shame. We've never done it because we don't drink or party or go home with boys like all you sluts, but you need to own up to it. The walk of shame means that you were looking so fucking good the night before that you got some. YOU GOT SOME. YOU ARE A HOT PEICE OF ASS. So stop dreading that walk of shame, call it the walk of fame and be proud that you did it and made it through (unless you have a make it past Planned Parenthood in the morning and than your a Dumb Ass).

Enjoy your college and non-thinking days while you can. Soon enough you're gonna be stuck with one guy who farts in his sleep, is balding and has a beer belly and wish that you could grab your heels and high-tail it out of there. (We wont, S&M will never settle for anything like that. but you probably will.)

LOVE
S&M

OMFG I think I hooked up with that guy

Being a slut has its cost. M and I wouldn't really know about that, but we do know that there is a price to pay for being a whore. Well apart from  Herpes or having the Clap, there are those awkward run in days, months, and sometimes years after you've hooked up with someone. There are somethings you can do though to make these encounters a little less dramatic. So, Don't worry Hoe's, S and M have got the remedy!
Your amazing and Hot, and this is what you have to remember at all times. Meaning that if you run into him tell them how fuckin' fantastic you are doing. Even if it's a lie. Try to be as least awkward as you can. Situations are only as bad as you make them. Unless this guy looks like sasquatch or has a dick like a muskrat, take a chill pill ( if they really do, then RUN BITCH RUN). As long as you make it seem like your doing better off than he is, which you honestly probably are, you'll be in clear water.

Let's just say that the guy you run into was the worst hook up of your life. First off, stop being such a drunk slut and choose your men more wisely. Second, the best thing to do is avoid him at all possible cost. Chances are he probably thought you were just as bad as he was. So save yourself the embarrassment, and flee the sight of the spotting asap.

Seeing these men or boys can be like seeing a tiger walking down the street. It is shocking! But remember stay calm and stake out your plan of action. Whether you thought he was awesome between the sheets or you fell asleep 30 seconds in because he bored you to death, you're going to survive these awkward run ins. Just realize that they are inevitable. If you could drunkenly find each other one night then chances are you're probably going to see each other sober, so either learn to deal or keep those legs closed.

Love you Sluts
GolDAMN
S & M

Welcome to Canada...AYE!

Ohhhh yes S&M are heading out for college weekend to good ole whistler. We're excited to get "drunk as shit" with our friends up north and the bitches we brought along. If you see us out buy us a shot or two... Or three.... Or four... ;) Ya never know if you'll get lucky. Just try and behave yourselves (although we don't promise to...) and let's all have the time of our lives this weekend. No matter where the fuck you are


Love
S&M

We've all got them... DAMMIT

The psycho ex
The what the fuck was I thinking
The omg she totally outchicked him
The "beer goggle" relationship

Having an awful relationship sucks. But nothing is worse then when after the breakup the other person goes crazy. This has been a very recent topic of conversation for S & M and we're literally fed up. If its over its over.  Please Don't be psychopathic about it.

Here's the thing. No matter how crazy you are before the fact (seeing as S & M are pretty crazy) becoming more crazy after the parting of ways is never a good thing to do. No one wants to have to deal with your shit. No one. We're broken up for a reason. I'm gonna go out and be with other guys. I'm gonna take them home and its gonna be amazing. You gonna see me out and I'm gonna look hot. SORRY. But that doesn't mean you should become so crazy that at points we literally fear for our safety. If you become a crazy ass please stay away. We want literally nothing to do with you.

Just last week M's ex, we'll call him RST, decided to take the psycho route. He was moving and still had some of her shit, so of course she texts asking if he'll set it aside and she can get it later in the week. He replies to come get it now, but obviously she can't because she has other plans with hot male undewear models so replies no but she'll get it ASAP. Well this just wasn't good enough for RST. Later when M and her roommates return home they find a garbage bag on their doorstep full of her clothes, shoes, jewelry, ripped up pictures of the two of them, ripped up pictures of her dogs, broken picture frames, broken glass everywhere, notes that she had written and exchanged gifts. REALLY? That's pretty sad.

She doesnt care about the sentimental shit okay? She just wanted her sexy ass clothing back, not the pictures that you can no longer look at because your a shit-tard.

M is not the only person with psycho ex's though. We all have them. And S does too. The thing is that after the break up the guys realize how fucking awesome and hot we are. SORRY BUT ITS JUST A LITTLE TOO LATE NOW. No matter how psycho you get our sexy asses will NEVER be getting back with your sorry saggy balls. SEE YA

Ladies, When you ex-boy starts showing signs of the crazy please run for the hills. You have always been better off without him. Plus, WHAT THE FUCK were you thinking dating him in the first place?

Forever GolDAMN,
S & M

TODAY IS YOUR LUCKY DAY

To one of our most dedicated followers:



HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEFF
you little slut
WE lOVE YOU.
Hope you get some tonight.
Make us proud! ; )




Love
GolDAMN
M & S

You sir, are an ASS

Want to know the one way that you AREN'T gonna get any? Yell something vulgar or sexual out of our car window and than drive away like a little pussy. REALLY BITCH?? Honestly, its not a compliment to hear, "Hey sexy baby can you handle my stick shift?" as your driving past. No I do not want to climb into your 95 Honda and get it on. You are an idiot.
   Just tonight S and I were walking into Target (the death of our credit cards FYI) and had two cholos yell out their windows about how sexy and hot we were and how they want to be in between our legs. UMM Well first of all we know we're hot. So please think of something more creative than that. And Second of all You are gross.
    Here's the thing. If you came up and approached us, started a conversation, and than asked us out, your chances of getting a number or a date would increase by 1232143523523408%. I love being approached by guys because it shows that you actually have a ball sack (and I do love me some good balls) If you actually came up and were a man about it, I would honestly probably go on a date with you. You may not get any, but hey who knows! This kinda goes for all girls too, and since all girls aren't as good lookin as S or M, you chances increase even more. (But then again not all girls are as slutty as us, so maybe not).

So why don't you stop being a little pussy ass, roll up your blacked out windows, get out of your bro-mobile, and come up to us girls and talk. It'll most likley pay off.
And if not, than you're probably destined to be alone, so stock up on some good porn, practice with shake-weight and get to be your own best friend.

Forever GolDAMN
M & S

Do girls Masturbate?

M and I recently came across this question, and we have to be completely honest..YES! Girls are extremely shy about it though. Imagine if a girl went around telling you that she just watched some hard-core lesbian porn last night. You would think she is a freak and probably a slut. Girls have a fine line of sluttness. Any little move that they do they could win the trophy of SLUT OF THE WEEK or MOST IMPROVED WHORE. Anyways, this is the reason girls don't flaunt masturbation. However, if you ask them, in the proper situation, you might get a giggly reaction telling you how much they actually do enjoy it. And if they tell you no, they are fucking lying. 

We are Humans. We are Horny. And Men can't be there 24/7 to please us. While most of us girls love when guy get's us off or girl for M and My case, we do love the occasional self rub down. 

For those of you girls who do deny it. Seriously grow up! This is completely natural for everyone to do. 

So think of the naughties thing you can or look up some good old porn, and get to flickin'!

GolDAMN 

S & M 

GIVE ME SOME BOOBIES

How much is too much?

Let's see here. Men love some boobies. BIG BOOBIES. See but here's the thing. M has got some BIG ole boobies going on. And the boys likey. ALOT. But that doesn't mean thats all the boys want. S has got some spankin tatas as well. And lets just say the boys want what she's flauntin.

Its not all about size though[although size does matter ;)] but about how you flaunt them. Boobs are a woman's power. With some tits and a little show a woman can make a man her bitch. Seriously. S and M have done it before and we'll do it again and again. Now S and I aren't asking you to go around showing some nipple cause that's not what ANYONE wants to see when they're walking around (unless your sending some kinky ass nakey pics to your significant other like S and I send to eachother) but cleavage is a must when going out. ladies boobs are sexy. And they're sexy because they're special to us. Don't try to hide them. S and M love some boobies. We love eachother's. We love yours. So please don't be afraid to show them off. Feel free to inbox us some pictures. We love surprises.

Cumin' into a New Year

Whatsuppp!? The GolDamns are back! We cannot wait for great 2011, and all the interesting, LAF (legit as Fuck, for those of you who are slow) post that we will be continuing to do this year! 
M & I have been hiding out this break doing stuff only hot as shit college girls do; however, we are ready to bring in the new year right with you guys. 
So stay tuned in to our blog, and be prepared to have your mind blown ( or whatever it is that you like blown) 
Yeah Bitch!
S & M